The Chasing Iamb

I was very pleased to see the VeryArchAngel in Dilli. I made screechy high-school noises and leapt upon him in a cafe called "Passion-My Cup of Tea." (SpellCheck also pointed out an Italian restaurant called Sartoria! And here I had thought only Vijaywada would have nomenclatural gems such as "Capsicum-the Spice of Life.")

VeryArchAngel brings important news. He has discovered a dildo manufacturer in Bangalore. Spellcheck and I responded to this news with the just so blase jubilation it deserved. The laugh was on us of course because VeryArchAngel had not merely discovered a dildo manufacturer. He had also discovered a Character.

The dildo manufacturer used to be a jeweller and has a very respectable life above ground. In the deep recesses of Jayanagar or Malleswaram or wherever he now runs (with the assistance of his son) a small workshop that makes dildos. He ventured in this direction, he told the VeryArchAngel, because he feels that women do not have enough pleasure in sex. He even has strap-ons for women. However he ignored the VeryArchAngel's attempt to explain that since he was gay he didnt have a girlfriend. VeryArchAngel bought two. An anatomically correct one for his gayvangelical work and another for himself. "One for my master and one for my slave," he said with a pleased grin.

The dildo man offended VeryArchAngel's sensibilities by wearing dozens of gold rings and by insisting that women on two-wheelers go over speed-breakers for sexual pleasure. VeryArchAngel steered him away from his sociological insights and asked about the manufacturing. Each mould costs about Rs.70,000, he found out. When VeryArchAngel offered to drum up some business for him, the dildo-man looked nervous and said that he was not so sure.

What colour are they, SpellCheck asked with the expression of one who has wandered into Twilight Zone. VeryArchAngel said, "White with blue spots."

This episode ends here.